For a brief time in my life I wanted to be a film director. I went so far as to be accepted to film school and on the first day I had what can only be considered an epiphany. Walking down the corridor excited about my nonexistent but palpable dream of being a great director, I stopped. Right there I asked myself the only question that matters when you are a father. Is this path the best for my family? I had my first child and I had been married for 2 years. The lure of the arts is a sexy siren. It took about 2 seconds for me to kill the dream of film school and ignite the dream of Clarence Darrow. Well, I am not Darrow but you get my drift. Don’t feel bad for me. I would have really hated the grind of rejection that comes in that world. I must have realized this subconsciously because I had also applied to law school simultaneously. Right there in that hallway I turned around then took myself out of film school and walked to the law school to start my legal career. I burned the ships and never looked back. No regrets either.
Practicing law is the greatest gift I have given myself. My clients are so valuable to me personally and professionally. I have only looked back to prove to people that I once was interesting. Life is funny. Realistically, we do the best we can with the information we get in the present. I think we beat ourselves up when our choices turn out weird by saying things like, “if I had known that I would have…” Well of course you would have made a different decision if the information was different. That is the real task in an age of distrust. We must gather the best and most accurate information we can before turning around in the hall. We have to get the best advice, the most relevant data then consult with the best advisors before we decide.
In our world of AI and do it yourself, admitting ignorance is a far cry from admitting stupidity. The former is a challenge of missing data the latter is a condition. The latter can’t be changed it can only be endured. Our present decisions have profound future consequences so avoid pining for what could have been or what might have been. Confirm you have the best information available, that you have sought the best advisors to tell it to you straight and that you are creating the best outcome for as many people in your life that you can.
Don’t be afraid to kill one dream just make sure you ignite another one.
Albert R. Hartley