Ok I think I have been too heavy handed in the last series of blogs. Thanks for indulging me but let’s try a light topic.
We can also collectively agree that 2026 has been shot out of a cannon with rocket fuel. February is a great month for me not because of Valentine’s Day. I love February because my eldest is turning 30 this month so I have been reminiscing about baby memories. The thought of taking my daughter home at 22 years of age seems insane looking back from my 52 year vantage point. My friends always gasp and clutch their pearls when I remind them, I have 30 and 28 year old kids. I feel like young parents are a rarity in 2026. I look at the age of some of my clients with young kids with horror! I get tired just looking at them chasing their kids. There are advantages of waiting but for me I feel that my youth worked in my favor.
Here are some lessons that I relied on at 22:
1. Say it once, get acknowledgment then be ready to move. Action is always better than words.
2. My innate spastic energy was a good thing with young kids. When my girls would assess my commitment to outlasting them they both would recognize my superior energy. Stay the course never negotiate with terrorists.
3. Running on little sleep was a standard so regardless of our lack of sleep we could pull deep from unknown reserves that would have been spent on midnight raves we never attended. It is survivor, Outwit Outplay Outlast!
4. We were broke, so there was no nanny or au pair to rely on. We were the go-to so we figured it out with the help of family. No rescue for us or them. There is a sense that we burned the ships so do the best you can. Our family was effectively on a deserted island. Make it work.
5. Kids are resilient so always love them and the mistakes will hopefully be forgotten or handled in therapy.
6. Read to them as much as possible.
7. Laugh with them as much as possible.
8. We tried to create independent strong-minded women. In our house we had a phrase, “we are building warriors not slaves.” If this rule is implemented be ready to get respectful push back that will make you uncomfortable. If you are uncomfortable, I think you are doing your job.
9. Celebrate your kids so they won’t need anyone else to celebrate them.
Albert R. Hartley